After celebrating a few birthdays, Valentines, and Chinese New Years, my sister broke the news that my grandmother had passed away. I was completely devastated and heartbroken. In the week that followed, I had lost my appetite, I couldn’t sleep - yet all I wanted to do was stay in bed all day, I would weep after Aric and the kiddies went to bed, and spent a lot of time contemplating life and mortality. The hardest thing for me to accept was that I didn’t get to see my grandmother. My parents and Wil had gone to Taiwan a month ago to visit her. Aric and I were waiting until Ashlyn’s spring-break to go visit. *sniff* A little too late now.
(last picture taken with grandma - November 2005)
Though my grandmother and I lived oceans apart, we were close. We shared a relationship that transcended our age and generation gap and cultural differences. She was an extraordinary person….full of life, spirit, and unconditional love. She lived simply, with discipline, patience, and an enthusiasm to learn new things (taking tai-chi, Chinese brush painting and sign-language classes at 80+ years of age). The smile lines on my cheeks, a love for sewing, and our identical hands are the things she passed down to me (although her hands are infinitely softer). *sigh* I miss her so much.
(on the phone)
Mom: “It’s noon…get out of bed! You have to get up, make yourself pretty, spend time with your husband and kids! Go eat, take care of yourself, exercise!
Dad: “You cannot be sad all the time. It’s not fair to your babies. You have to continue to live and be happy.”
After a much needed verbal kick in the butt by my parents, I’m doing better now.
…but I still have my moments.
February 28th, 2007 at 3:51 pm
my condolences, peg. i just found out today that my auntie (my late mom’s sister) died last night, too.
peg: thank you, and my condolences to you and yours as well.
February 28th, 2007 at 4:07 pm
aw, peg
it sounds like your grandmother was an amazing lady. i’m so sorry for your loss.
peg: thanks, lei. *hugs*
February 28th, 2007 at 7:28 pm
i’m sorry for your loss. i love how she held your arm in the photo. she must’ve been a proud grandma.
peg: thanks, amy. we were always holding hands in pictures. she really made me feel special.
February 28th, 2007 at 8:10 pm
i’m so sorry for your loss hon. your grandmother sounds like an amazing woman… learning sign language at 80+ years old? wow. *hugs*
peg: thanks, hon! this was the grandma we stayed with in Taiwan. remember how she would put on lipstick before going to tai-chi (usually as we were just getting in from the pubs)? yeah, she was cool like that.
February 28th, 2007 at 9:22 pm
*big hug* you are a wonderful granddaughter and i know your gramma feels the same. please don’t live with any regret…
chin up…i love you…
peg: thanks, and i love you too!!!
March 1st, 2007 at 11:11 am
I’m so sorry for your loss! It’s perfectly okay to be sad for a while, BUT don’t wallow in it for too long. I think your grandma would want you to celebrate her life, not grieve for it. You have THE most amazing and loving family! She probably passed that along to all of you! BIG HUG!
peg: thanks, evain! i could always count on you to tell me like it is. i miss you!
March 1st, 2007 at 12:37 pm
I’m with Evain- the best way to honor your grandmother’s love for life and spirit is for you to continue living the happiest life you can. We all love you, Peg!
and putting on lipstick before going to tai-chi? She obviously also passed on to you her cool hipster ways.
peg: i promise to continue living the happiest life and put on lipstick in the morning!
<3 back at you!
March 1st, 2007 at 9:38 pm
Peg, wow, I’m really touched by your tribute to your grandmother. It’s great you had such a loving relationship when she was alive. I’m sorry for your loss, but I’m sure she would have wanted you to be happy. HUGS!!!
March 2nd, 2007 at 3:33 pm
i’m so sorry, peg.
i too wished i was there
for my grandfather in taiwan.
*hugs*
March 3rd, 2007 at 9:47 am
that is such a beautiful picture you have with your grandma, holding your hand. what a beloved woman to be sung such praises by her own grandchildren.
March 3rd, 2007 at 11:43 pm
*hugs* lovely photo and I’m sure you’ve got many lovely memories of and with your grandmother.
March 21st, 2007 at 12:57 pm
*HUGS*
Sounds like your grandmother was a great woman who influenced you greatly.
I hope that you find peace within yourself over your family’s loss.
xoxo, zay
April 21st, 2007 at 9:07 am
You are a great reflection of your grandmother. Kind, beautiful, and caring. She will live on forever in you and in your two daughters and the generations that follow.
Sorry for your loss.